Finding My Voice, Telling My Story

Finding my Voice,

Becoming visible,

Putting the shame where it belongs

Which is on the rapists and people that protected

the bastards that raped me.

I will not be silenced,

I was silenced for to long after

being raped at 11, 19,23, and 25.

I never asked to be raped,

I was a innocent child and

knew nothing about rape when

a sixteen year old raped me.

I was then told to be quiet

and to never tell any one.

At 19, I was told by police officer that I

deserved to be raped by two men when

I drank for the first time and could not


When i was 23, I was raped by a friend

Then when i joined the Navy and went to

A school , I was raped twice by the same guy

that was a Third Class Petty Officer and a fleet


I was told over and over again that it was my fault,

That I was nothing but a walking mattress that

deserved what had happened.

I did not enlist in the Navy to be raped, betrayed and

thrown away like a piece of garbage.

I will not be silent any more.

Rape should not be part of growing up and rapists should

answer for what they do.

Rape should not be part of attending a university and police

officers should not defend rapists.

Rape should not be part of serving your country. I did

not enlist to be raped by fellow service member.  We

are brothers, sisters, Mothers, Fathers, Aunt’s, Uncle’s,

Nephews, Niece’s and we do not deserve to be raped and told

that the UCMJ does not apply to us after being raped.

We do not deserve seeing the chain of command doing

everything they can to protect a rapist.

We do not deserve the emotional abuse and institutional abuse

after being raped.

We had a crime committed against us that we did not ask for.

We deserve support.

Having the rapist prosecuted not promoted and sent to another

command so he can continue to rape over and over again.

Where does protecting rapists come into the Core Values

of Honor, Courage, Commitment?

I will continue to speak out against rape!!

Rape is not sex.

Rape is about power and control.

What has happened to me has changed me for

the rest of my life.


Author: shellback0608

Julie "Jewels" is an Author, Poet, Nia Blue Belt, Green Belt, White Belt dance instructor, Reiki Jin Kei Do Energy Healer, and advocate. When she is not writing, you can find her learning new Nia routines, listening to healing music, taking photographs, playing with her dog and spending time with her friends and family.

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